“Perfection Paralysis” personally speaking

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Is it just me? Or do you, too, suffer from the mind’s amazing capacity to have creative and inspired ideas only to be utterly crippled by the very same mind’s expectations of perfection and certain failure? Recently I began the process of reforming my business offering including a rebrand and a decision to focus on my heart’s desire for my business and a strategy to build it. I brought in expert help and am working with a talented marketing and creative team who are excited about my vision, too. It feels like something brilliant and very “me” will emerge. The Fluffy Pink Cloud Effect So far so good. I believe in me. They believe in me. My heart is telling me not only is it possible, but R. Kelly probably even believes HE can still fly. So why not me? Clearly, it’s...

What does your boogeyman tell you? And what do you tell it?

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Lately I’ve been experiencing a period of great excitement and my heart swells with possibility and hope. And with this swelling of goodness and joy, my old friend, the boogeyman has come to visit. I remember meeting my boogeyman for the first (and excruciatingly painful time) when I was a kid. And it’s a very predictable boogeyman; it always delivers. Throughout my life, it comes along just when I’m moving into deep joy and contentment; when real intimacy is possible. I wonder if you have one, too? A saboteur in your midst? A wounded inner child in your heart? Simply a conditioned belief doing what it’s “supposed” to do? Or something else? Do you, too, have a familiar old boogeyman that pops into your life at such times of potential of happiness? My...

10 Songs I Turn to for Inspiration & Energy

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When I hear music, I fear no danger. I am invulnerable. I see no foe. I am related to the earliest times, and to the latest. – Henry David Thoreau Compiling this list of 10 songs has been a real labor of love. I’m not claiming to understand the songwriters’ meaning in the songs or even what general consensus is of their meaning. What I am sharing is that they’ve each helped to energize me, inspire me and empower me in the way I experience them. Enjoy! 1. Firework – Katy Perry Key lyrics: Baby you’re a firework Come on let your colors burst Make ’em go “Oh, oh, oh!” You’re gonna leave ’em fallin’ down-own-own   Why it inspires: how can any song telling you’re a firework shooting across the sky, sky, SKY...

I call bullsh*t on gratitude journals – they’ve never done a thing for me!

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Yeah, you heard me. I’m calling out gratitude journals right here, right now. They have never done a thing for me; it’s a pointless exercise which leaves me feeling empty, frustrated and crappy about myself. Before you brand me a spiritual blasphemer, let me explain: For over 25 years, I’ve heard people all around me say that they write gratitude lists daily as part of their spiritual practice. And for over 25 years I have tried that. Because if spiritual giants are saying it works, then it must, right? WRONG. Not for this chick-a-dee. My mind labors to make an appropriate list because I’m searching for gratitude in my mind. It’s like I’m not in my heart at all, I’m solely using my mind to try to create this evasive feeling of gratitude. I make my...

This is what I’ve learned 30 days into my 90 Days of Giving

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I’m one month into my 90 Days of Giving and I’ve been so fortunate and feel so grateful that I’ve been able to work with people both stateside as well as in the UK, in person and by phone for the last 30 days. And from this experience, there is one key thing I’ve learned during the first 30 days: These people are BRAVE. B-R-A-V-E. BRAVE. Giving lip service to general ideas of expansion, following your dreams, building your business, being more visible, being truly seen, charging what you’re really worth – these are all easy and quite comforting daydreams in their own right. But lip service and day dreaming are safe and easy (I should know, they’re some of my favorite hobbies). What takes real COURAGE is being willing to step forward into your...

The first time I answered, “How are you?” with “I’m really well, thanks” and meant it, I was traumatized for a week.

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How would it be to be really well? What danger and risk is there if I allow myself to experience goodness and what’s more, share that with someone else? Will the sky fall? Will I be punished by some karmic backhand for daring to be not just okay or surviving but really and truly well? These are the questions that flooded my mind the first time I answered “How are you?” with “I’m really well, thanks” and meant it. After 40 something years of analyzing my stuff, dissecting my issues, sharing and getting feedback and experiencing a lot of healing, I had unwittingly also built an identity out of it all. I WAS my painful story. I joked with my friends I had a body suit of pain (think scuba suit). It was what I knew and I was extraordinarily intimate with...

Things I say to Phoenix when I’m hiking

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When I’m on the mountain, the superhero version of myself emerges. I’m all powerful, deeply mindful, connected to everything and know that all things are possible. I also treat Phoenix, Arizona like a childhood friend from my past, someone from whom I had drifted away as we saw the world differently and wanted different things but have recently reunited. And it’s to this Phoenix that I find myself speaking and these are the things say: Wow. So here I am, after all these years away and you know what, Phoenix? I kind of dig you. Hey Phoenix, I’m ready. Let’s do this. I still can’t believe I am liking being in you; it’s so different to how I’ve thought of you all these years. Cool. This is such a healing place for me. Phoenix, you’re so...

My 90 Days of Giving – can I give to you and yours?

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Something that’s important to me is giving; giving for giving sake is a very powerful part of my life and as a result, I have made an exciting decision. For 90 consecutive days, I will donate 1 HOUR OF FREE CONSULTATION/COACHING each day per person who wants it (anywhere in the world, thanks to technology). This is not a sales pitch, I am not selling anything. Really. Seriously! This is a no obligation, one time free consultation with no sales motive. This is simply a true gift of my time and sharing my expertise, that is all. Here are a few scenarios, as examples, of how I might help you or someone you know: You have a product or service that you’ve always wanted to explore to see if it could be a business for you but you don’t know where to start You’re a small business and...

Why I don’t understand LinkedIn and how I’m crap at it

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LinkedIn baffles me. There, I said it. I simply do. not. get. it. Someone please tell me, what exactly it is and how I should use it? Is it the Facebook for the people we don’t actually like that much but one day might help us get a job? Perhaps it’s like a big, digital notice board where we all pin our business cards up hoping someone might one day need our services? Or is it a tool for comparing ourselves to former colleagues who have climbed the corporate ladder and reached a level of success we can still only dream of? Those are just a few of the ways I experience LinkedIn. My conclusion is that when it comes to using LinkedIn, I’m pretty sure I’m crap at it and here’s my evidence: Exhibit A: I expect it to be a happy, clappy place like my Facebook page...

What do yoga and deep tissue massage have in common? My tears, apparently.

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Yes, you read that right. 2 of the most healing things I can do for myself often leave this girl in tears. At first, I met my tears with frustration and judgement, “What is my major malfunction here? What’s wrong with me that I can’t hold it together right now?” Eventually I stopped fighting it and just started going with it. And as I did, I realized that both practices have the following 3 things in common that conspire to create my watershed of tears: 1. Stillness – although my yoga practice is a definite work out, its key is the breath and as I focus on that while holding poses, my heart chakra opens creating a still space of noticing.  On the massage table, it’s similar. Although there’s movement by the massage therapist, I am in a static...